Rejection Slip Theater © with Paul Berge

Rejection Slip Theater episode 7b

2008-03-27T17:40:00.004-06:00

Hey, kids, wake up! It's time for Rejection Slip Theater, the radio drama show your parents warned you about, but now that you're a parent there's no one to keep you from listening.

I'm your host, Paul Berge, and as a parent myself, I know the importance of monitoring children's entertainment, and that's why this episode has been approved by the National Council on Good Stuff For Kids of All Ages (except the Bronze Age) and includes a real live western shoot 'em up. You know, the kinds that used to be on TV, except our mind movie (TM) westerns don't have a lot of girls getting in the way of the horses, six-shooters and Winchesters.

Later, we'll take our weekly visit to Westwood, New Jersey (Exit 168 on the Garden State Parkway) to visit Artie Azzetti and the Gang at St. Anthony's Elementary School, where this week's economics lesson includes raising Sea Monkeys. .

And finally, a story, starring Morgan Halgren, about a woman trying to save face who winds up losing it, instead...and in a way only radio can do.

It's all just a click away: http://feeds.feedburner.com/rejectionsliptheater

Rejection Slip Theater Podcast Radio © credits: Rejection Slip Theater (original © 1993), was created and produced by Joseph Pundzak and Paul Berge. Michael Meacham, Technical Director. This episode's Rejection Players cast features: Michael Meacham, Michael Cornelison, Richard Choate, Patty Choate and Joseph Pundzak, Morgan Halgren, Greg Anderson, Linda Blakely and many more truly talented actors.
Joseph Pundzak is the Executive Producer. Original music by Jamie Poulsen. All Artie Azzetti And The Gang © stories were written and performed by Paul Berge, all rights reserved.
All original written stories remain the copyrighted property of the authors, used with permission by Rejection Slip Theater, which retains all rights to the audio productions. Most of the radio performers are available for voice work through Radio Garage in Urbandale, Iowa: (http://www.radiogarage.com/).
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Hey, kids: Wanna put on a Live Radioplay in the privacy of your own sweat shop, theater class or prison community room? Who doesn't? Well, some of the RST radioplays are available for theatrical production. Contact us for scripts, fees and copyrights at: rejectslip@aol.com Write "RST scripts" in the subject bar. No: attachments, Fwd, SPAM, viri or embedded messages, please, or you'll be forced to listen to Hillary Clinton retell her paratrooper exploits in Bosnia.
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"...and I've been your host, Paul Berge. Good night...or good morning. Whatever works."
.......... ***

Rejection Slip Theater Episode 6b

2008-02-15T18:54:00.004-06:00

Hey, kids, wake up! It's time for Rejection Slip Theater ©, podcast Episode 6b, The Bingo Show, first aired on radio in 1994, maybe 1995. Dates get a little fuzzy, but it was definitely after Pearl Harbor and before George W. Bush took the country "Nucular."
On this episode we explore the stickier side of flattery in a story called, Flattery Will Get You. You'll also hear a story about small town baseball. Plus, we make our usual visit to Westwood, New Jersey (Exit 168 on the Garden State Parkway, take #165 if you want to save a dime), to meet up with those kids from St. Anthony's Elementary School, Artie Azzetti and the Gang in a game of high-stakes, no-hold 'em BINGO!
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It's all just a click away: http://feeds.feedburner.com/rejectionsliptheater
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So, if everyone has their cake--enjoy.

Rejection Slip Theater Podcast Radio © credits: Rejection Slip Theater (original © 1993), was created and produced by Joseph Pundzak and Paul Berge. Michael Meacham, Technical Director. This episode's Rejection Players cast features: Michael Meacham, Michael Cornelison, Richard Choate, Patty Choate and Joseph Pundzak...maybe, Morgan Halgren, Greg Anderson, Linda Blakely and many more truly talented actors.

All original written stories remain the copyrighted property of the authors, used with permission by Rejection Slip Theater, which retains all rights to the audio productions.
Most of the radio performers are available for voice work through Radio Garage in Urbandale, Iowa: (http://www.radiogarage.com/).

Hey, kids: Wanna put on a Live Radioplay in the privacy of your own locker room, theater class or prison community room? Who doesn't? Well, some of the RST radioplays are available for theatrical production. Contact us for scripts, fees and copyrights at: rejectslip@aol.com Write "RST scripts" in the subject bar. No: attachments, Fwd, viri or embedded messages, please, or you'll be forced to listen to Hillary Clinton nag you about your penmanship.

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Our podcast guru is Dan Wardell. More RST podcasts at: http://feeds.feedburner.com/rejectionsliptheater RST web site and Contact Us: http://www.paulberge.com/ Rejected Presidential Primary coverage at: http://www.blogparty08.blogspot.com/ "...and I've been your host, Paul Berge. Good night...or good morning. Whatever works."

.......... ***

Rejection Slip Theater Episode 5b, The Mystery Show

2008-02-13T12:01:00.007-06:00

Hey, kids, wake up! It's time for Rejection Slip Theater ©, podcast Episode 5b, The Mystery Radio Show, first aired on radio in 1994...or 1995...possibly 1996. We say that in all confidence because, frankly, we lost the notes and can't recall what's on this episode. It's a mystery. So, do us all a favor here at the Rejection Radio Ranch, listen to the broadcast, take notes and drop us a line ("These two guys walk into a bar..."). Let us, the producers, know just what we produced all those years ago.

Despite this momentary lapse in...in...ah...memory, we assume that this episode will be filled with radio drama, adventure, romance, comedy--maybe a talking horse or a singing pig wearing a bikini--and, probably, another visit to Westwood, New Jersey (Exit 168 on the Garden State Parkway, take #165 if you want to save a dime), where we'll meet up with those kids from St. Anthony's Elementary School, Artie Azzetti and the Gang.

But, that's all conjecture unless you listen to the entire episode and write to us in the Comments section below. You won't get paid for this; few in radio ever are, except Rush Limbaugh, who, we need to point out is not gay. Not that there'd be anything wrong with Rush Limbaugh being gay, which he reportedly is not. We're just saying...

It's all just a click away: http://feeds.feedburner.com/rejectionsliptheater

Meanwhile, enjoy the show, and for those keeping score, here are the Rejection Slip Theater Podcast Radio © credits: Rejection Slip Theater (original © 1993), was created and produced by Joseph Pundzak and Paul Berge. Michael Meacham, Technical Director. This episode's Rejection Players cast features: Michael Meacham, Michael Cornelison, Richard Choate, Patty Choate and Joseph Pundzak...and probably Morgan Halgren, Greg Anderson, Linda Blakely and many more truly talented actors. We just won't know until you listen.
We do know that Joseph Pundzak is the Executive Producer. Original music by Jamie Poulsen. All Artie Azzetti And The Gang © stories were written and performed by Paul Berge, all rights reserved. All original written stories remain the copyrighted property of the authors, used with permission by Rejection Slip Theater, which retains all rights to the audio productions.

Most performers are available for voice work through Radio Garage in Urbandale, Iowa: (http://www.radiogarage.com/).
.
Hey, kids: Wanna put on a Live Radioplay in the privacy of your own locker room, theater class or prison community room? Who doesn't? Well, some of the RST radioplays are available for theatrical production. Contact us for scripts, fees and copyrights at: rejectslip@aol.com
Write "RST scripts" in the subject bar. No: attachments, Fwd, viri or embedded messages, please, or you'll be forced to listen to Hillary Clinton nag you about your penmanship.

Our podcast guru is Dan Wardell. More RST podcasts at: http://feeds.feedburner.com/rejectionsliptheater RST web site and Contact Us: http://www.paulberge.com/ Rejected Presidential Primary coverage at: http://www.blogparty08.blogspot.com/
"...and I've been your host, Paul Berge. Good night...or good morning. Whatever works."
.......... ***

Rejection Slip Theater Episode 24a

2008-02-01T17:30:00.000-06:00

Hey, kids, wake up! It's time for Rejection Slip Theater ©, podcast Episode 24a, first aired on radio in 1994. In tonight's episode...

Whaddya mean, it's not night? You're listening to this stuff during daylight hours? Donchya know that can hurt your eyes? Sheesh....Okay, since this is radio, and anything goes, so just pretend it's night. .

Now, where was I...lessee, Hey, Kids, blah, blah, blah....oh yeah, on tonight's episode the Rejection Players take you on a hunting expedition in...

What, now?

No, this isn't a real hunting expedition, and no real animals were hurt in the making of this Mind Movie (TM) ...in fact, Rejection Slip Theater is the only podcast radio drama program that has been approved by PETA. *.

Now, quit interrupting. There are millions of listeners who want to hear the dang hunting story.

Plus we take you to Vermont for a major minor league baseball game like nothing you've ever experienced, unless, of course, you're really weird or live in Vermont. Say, Cheese!.

And, as always, we visit Westwood, New Jersey, Exit 168 off the Garden State Parkways (Exit 165 if you want to save a dime) for a visit with Artie Azzetti and the Gang at St. Anthony's Elementary School where they learn the true meaning of Bingo!.

It's all just a click away: http://feeds.feedburner.com/rejectionsliptheater .

Remember, kids: Tell your friends where you heard it--for free--on Rejection Slip Theater Podcast Radio ©. Credits: Rejection Slip Theater (original © 1993), was created and produced by Joseph Pundzak and Paul Berge. Michael Meacham, Technical Director. This episode's Rejection Players cast features: Michael Meacham, Michael Cornelison, Richard Choate, Patty Choate and Joseph Pundzak.

Joseph Pundzak, Executive Producer. Original music by Jamie Poulsen. All Artie Azzetti And The Gang © stories were written and performed by Paul Berge, all rights reserved. All original written stories remain the copyrighted property of the authors, used with permission by Rejection Slip Theater, which retains all rights to the audio productions. Most performers are available for voice work through Radio Garage in Urbandale, Iowa: (http://www.radiogarage.com/).

* PETA: Professional Entertaining Talking Animals.

Write "RST scripts" in the subject bar. No: attachments, Fwd, viri or embedded messages, please, or you'll be forced to listen to the complete Mitt Romney campaign promises collection while standing in an Iowa corn field. Our podcast guru is Dan Wardell. More RST podcasts at: http://feeds.feedburner.com/rejectionsliptheater RST web site and Contact Us: http://www.paulberge.com/ Rejected Presidential Primary coverage at: http://www.blogparty08.blogspot.com/

"...and I've been your host, Paul Berge. Good night...or good morning. Whatever works."

..........***

Rejection Slip Theater 23a

2007-12-31T08:26:00.000-06:00

Hey, kids, wake up! It's time for Rejection Slip Theater ©, podcast Episode 23a, first aired on radio in 1994.
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In this episode we meet Henry and Peaches played by Michael Cornelison and Linda Blakely in a radio drama written by Paul Berge.
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And, as always, we take the Garden State Parkway, Exit 168--or 165 if you want to save a dime--to Westwood, New Jersey to visit Artie Azzetti and the Gang ©, as they enter a secret society.
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These Mind Movies are only a click away: http://feeds.feedburner.com/rejectionsliptheater Remember, kids: Tell your friends where you heard it--for free--on Rejection Slip Theater Podcast Radio ©. Credits: Rejection Slip Theater (original © 1993), was created and produced by Joseph Pundzak and Paul Berge. Michael Meacham, Technical Director. This episode's Rejection Players cast features: Michael Meacham, Michael Cornelison, Linda Blakely and Joseph Pundzak.
Joseph Pundzak, Executive Producer. Original music by Jamie Poulsen. All Artie Azzetti And The Gang © stories were written and performed by Paul Berge, all rights reserved. All original written stories remain the copyrighted property of the authors, used with permission by Rejection Slip Theater, which retains all rights to the audio productions. Most performers are available for voice work through Radio Garage in Urbandale, Iowa: (http://www.radiogarage.com/).
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Hey, kids: Wanna put on a Live Radioplay in the privacy of your own locker room, community center or VFW Hall? Who doesn't? Some of the RST radioplays are available for theatrical production. Contact us for scripts, fees and copyrights at: rejectslip@aol.com
Write "RST scripts" in the subject bar. No: attachments, Fwd, viri or embedded messages, please, or the US Librarian of Congress will shush you so fast, sister, it'll...well, it'll do nothing. Our podcast guru is Dan Wardell. More RST podcasts at: http://feeds.feedburner.com/rejectionsliptheater RST web site and Contact Us: http://www.paulberge.com/ Iowa Caucus coverage at http://www.blogparty08.blogspot.com/ "...and I've been your host, Paul Berge. Good night...or good morning. Whatever works." *** Artie Azzetti and the Gang ©, by Paul Berge, all rights reserved. All wrongs righted.

Rejection Slip Theater 22a ©

2007-10-03T07:20:00.000-06:00

Hey, kids, wake up! It's time for a whole new season of Rejection Slip Theater ©, podcast Episode 22a, first aired on radio in 1994.

Years before Homeland Insecurity forced airline passengers to remove shoes and fear random toothpaste inspections, RST aired a horror story about the inner workings of a slightly deranged airline captain's mind. Due to events that followed seven years after "In Good Hands" © aired it's been stored in the RST vault. Now, it's back for your consideration.

And, as always, we take the Garden State Parkway, Exit 168, to Westwood, New Jersey to visit Artie Azzetti and the Gang ©, as they try to decode Jean Shepherd's barbaric yawp shouted across the rooftops of the 1968 suburban world: Flick Lives!

These Mind Movies are only a click away:
http://feeds.feedburner.com/rejectionsliptheater

Remember, kids: Tell your friends where you heard it--for free--on Rejection Slip Theater Podcast Radio ©.
Credits: Rejection Slip Theater (original © 1993), was created and produced by Joseph Pundzak and Paul Berge.
Michael Meacham, Technical Director.
This episode's Rejection Players cast features: Michael Meacham, Michael Cornelison and Joseph Pundzak.
Joseph Pundzak, Executive Producer.
Original music by Jamie Poulsen.
All Artie Azzetti And The Gang © stories were written and performed by Paul Berge, all rights reserved.
All original written stories remain the copyrighted property of the authors, used with permission by Rejection Slip Theater, which retains all rights to the audio productions.

Most performers are available for voice work through Radio Garage in Urbandale, Iowa (http://www.radiogarage.com/).

Hey, kids: Wanna Put On A Live Radioplay? Who doesn't? Some of the RST radioplays are available for theatrical production. Contact us for scripts, fees and copyrights at: rejectslip@aol.com Write "RST scripts" in the subject bar. No: attachments, Fwd, viri or embedded messages, please, or the US Librarian of Congress will shush you so fast, sister, it'll...well, it'll do nothing.
Our podcast guru is Dan Wardell. More RST podcasts at: http://feeds.feedburner.com/rejectionsliptheater
RST web site and Contact Us: http://www.paulberge.com/
Iowa Caucus coverage at http://www.blogparty08.blogspot.com/
"...and I've been your host, Paul Berge. Good night...or good morning. Whatever works." *** Artie Azzetti and the Gang ©, by Paul Berge, all rights reserved. All wrongs righted.

Rejection Slip Theater 21a ©

2007-08-14T06:37:00.000-06:00

Hey, kids, wake up! It's time for a whole new season of Rejection Slip Theater ©, podcast Episode 21a, first aired on radio in 1994.

Fly me to the moon...or anywhere beyond that hunk of metaphorical space cheese hanging loose inside your imagination. Rejection Astronaut, Michael Meacham, dons his official RST Space Cadet Suit (TM) and leaves his '64 Galaxy behind to blast off for adventure as the Intergalactic Traveler © . The story was written by Paul Berge and engineered beyond perfection by Meacham, who plays all the voices.

Then, after orbiting Uranus, RST returns to earth through a time wrap *, again, to visit Artie Azzetti and the Gang ©**, in Westwood, New Jersey for a camping misadventure sure to pop the merit badges off your Boy Scout sash.

Plus, Angle of Repose ©, written by Chris Santella, is quite possibly the greatest radio MindMovie (TM) ever produced about potatoes....(potatoes?). As with Intergalactic Traveler, this is a one-man performance starring Michael Cornelison.

It's all ahead and accessible at the speed of Lite (TM) . Simply click on the RST link: http://feeds.feedburner.com/rejectionsliptheater

And, then, let your mind take it from there.

Remember, kids: Tell your friends where you heard it--for free--on Rejection Slip Theater Podcast Radio ©.

Credits: Rejection Slip Theater (original © 1993), was created and produced by Joseph Pundzak and Paul Berge.
Michael Meacham, Technical Director.
This episode's Rejection Players cast features: Michael Meacham, Michael Cornelison.
Joseph Pundzak, Executive Producer.
Original music by Jamie Poulsen.
All Artie Azzetti And The Gang © stories were written and performed by Paul Berge, all rights reserved.
All original written stories remain the copyrighted property of the authors, used with permission by Rejection Slip Theater, which retains all rights to the audio productions.
Most performers are available for voice work through Radio Garage in Urbandale, Iowa (http://www.radiogarage.com/).
Wanna Put On A Live Radioplay? Who doesn't? Some of the RST radioplays are available for theatrical production. Contact us for scripts, fees and copyrights at: rejectslip@aol.com Write "RST scripts" in the subject bar. No: attachments, Fwd, viri or embedded messages, please, or the US Librarian of Congress will shush you so fast, sister, it'll...well, it'll do nothing.
Our podcast guru is Dan Wardell.
More RST podcasts at: http://feeds.feedburner.com/rejectionsliptheater RST web site and Contact Us: http://www.paulberge.com/
Iowa caucus coverage at http://www.blogparty08.blogspot.com/
"...and I've been your host, Paul Berge. Good night...or good morning. Whatever works."

***

*Let's not confuse that with the Time Warp, again.
** Artie Azzetti and the Gang ©, by Paul Berge, all rights reserved.
Potatoes? We aired a story about potatoes? Doesn't anyone screen this stuff?

Rejection Slip Theater 20a

2007-07-24T10:45:00.000-06:00

Hey, kids, wake up! It's time for a whole new season of Rejection Slip Theater ©, podcast Episode 20a, first aired on radio in 1994.

With one click you're seconds away from standing toe-to-toe with an armed apparition in "The Gunslinger," © protected under the Second Commandment, right to arm bears, and written by Brandon Irons. No relation to Jeremy. In fact, we suspect it's a pen name...perhaps Jeremy Irons' pen name. In the cast are: Michael Cornelison, Doug Hawley, John Busbee and Joesph Pundzak.

Long before "Forest Gump"© there was "Amos,"© a story by Barbie Gatschett. In the cast are: Greg Anderson, Annie Meacham, Michael Cornelison and Michael Meacham.

And, as always, we take the Garden State Parkway, Exit 168, to Westwood, New Jersey circa 1967 to visit Artie Azzetti And The Gang © as they deal with life suddenly complicated by "Going Steady."©

It's all ahead, available 24/7 in glorious MindMovie ColourVision (TM) at: http://feeds.feedburner.com/rejectionsliptheater

And, remember, kids: Tell your friends where you heard it--for free--on Rejection Slip Theater Podcast Radio ©.
Credits: Rejection Slip Theater (original © 1993), was created and produced by Joseph Pundzak and Paul Berge.
Michael Meacham, Technical Director.
This episode's Rejection Players cast features: Michael Meacham, Michael Cornelison, Greg Anderson, Annie Meacham, Doug Hawley, John Busbee, Joseph Pundzak and Paul Berge
Joseph Pundzak, Executive Producer.
Original music by Jamie Poulsen.
All Artie Azzetti And The Gang © stories were written and performed by Paul Berge, all rights reserved.
All original written stories remain the copyrighted property of the authors, used with permission by Rejection Slip Theater, which retains all rights to the audio productions. Most performers are available for voice work through Radio Garage in Urbandale, Iowa (http://www.radiogarage.com/).

Wanna Put On A Live Radioplay? Who doesn't? Some of the RST radioplays are available for theatrical production. Contact us for scripts, fees and copyrights at: rejectslip@aol.com Write "RST scripts" in the subject bar. No: attachments, Fwd, viri or embedded messages, please, or the US DoJ will surge at you so fast, mister, it'll...well, it'll do nothing.
Our podcast guru is Dan Wardell.
More RST podcasts at: http://feeds.feedburner.com/rejectionsliptheater RST web site and Contact Us: http://www.paulberge.com/
"...and I've been your host, Paul Berge. Good night...or good morning. Whatever works."

Rejection Slip Theater 19a, Memorial Day Special ©

2007-05-23T06:48:00.000-06:00

Hey, kids, wake up! It's time for Rejection Slip Theater ©, podcast Episode 19a, the Memorial Day episode, first aired in May 1994.

Memories, like radio hosts, are often feeble, but the mighty Rejection Players © found the strength to reflect upon the unsung aspects of a day to remember.

Plus, Artie Azzetti and the Gang ©, take the listener back to 1966 to share a memory of the a US Marine from Westwood, New Jersey, killed in Vietnam, in an Artie Azzetti story called Nuns and Vietnam ©.

So, to share this Memorial Day RST Special click on: http://feeds.feedburner.com/rejectionsliptheater

And, remember, kids: Tell your friends where you heard it--for free--on Rejection Slip Theater Podcast Radio ©.

Michael Meacham, Technical Director.

This episode's Rejection Players cast features: Michael Meacham, Michael Cornelison, Greg Anderson, Annie Meacham, Paul Berge

Joseph Pundzak, Executive Producer.

Original music by Jamie Poulsen.

All Artie Azzetti and the Gang © stories were written and performed by Paul Berge.

All original written stories remain the copyrighted property of the authors, used with permission by Rejection Slip Theater, which retains all rights to the audio productions.
Most performers are available for voice work through Radio Garage in Urbandale, Iowa (http://www.radiogarage.com/).

Wanna Put On A Live Radioplay? Who doesn't? Some of the RST radioplays are available for theatrical production. Contact us for scripts, fees and copyrights at: rejectslip@aol.com
Write "RST scripts" in the subject bar. No attachments, Fwd, viri or embedded messages, please, or the US Congress will waggle a non-binding finger at you so fast, buster, it'll...well, it'll do nothing.

Our podcast guru is Dan Wardell.

More RST podcasts at: http://feeds.feedburner.com/rejectionsliptheater RST web site and Contact Us: http://www.paulberge.com/

"...and I've been your host, Paul Berge. Good night...or good morning. Whatever works."

Rejection Slip Theater Presidential Campaign

2007-05-17T11:47:00.000-06:00

Who Wants To Ride Air Force One? ©
© 2007, Paul Berge

Tired of rejection from the mainstream political parties? Sick of the traditional nominating process for President of the United States? Don't know a caucus from a primary?
Well, forget Iowa and New Hampshire. Why should they choose who’s going be the next presidential candidates? Forget about Super-Duper Tuesday, Mad Monday or bunching all the primary dates into one votefest in early February to mollify whiny Californians. Instead, the next President of the United States, hereafter referred to as Commander Guy, will be selected by (hold onto your campaign hats) popular vote.

Radical, perhaps, but if you’re willing to become a contestant on Who Wants To Ride Air Force One? ©, you may be our candidate to compete against Mitt, Hillary, Rudy, or whatever prepackaged haircut survives the traditional route to the 2008 election. We’re looking for the ultimate democratic (small d) non-partisan, Blog Party © Presidential Candidate to be chosen by our viewing audience through a grueling (often humiliating) gladiatorial process not unlike the real thing put on by the Democrats and Republicans. That winner will then be registered as a real candidate on the November 2008 ballot (if we can afford the fee). Here’s how it works:

Think Reality TV (An oxymoron, we admit). Anyone with half-a-brain, which is considerably more than the usual candidates bring to the contest, can participate.

Step 1: Declare Your Candidacy here in the Comments link. It costs nothing. Keep it clean, brief and no sniping at the other candidates, unless they deserve it. Instantly, you'll become the front runner, if only for a microsecond in cyberspace. Take advantage of that moment in the spotlight to solicit massive campaign contributions from K Street lobbyists. Turn nothing down. You can always apologize later.

Your moment in the lead will be fleeting so be ready for...

Step 2:
Issue a Policy Statement that no one understands but includes references to Abortion (without taking a stance), Drugs (without admitting use in college or offending drug firms), Family (be for this, especially if your backer is name Corleone), Gay Marriage (see Abortion), Guns (quick, hit the NRA link to become a retroactive lifetime member), Education (see Family), the Military (espouse strong support here; go really over the top if you’ve never actually served yourself), the Environment (you’re generally for the environment but don’t quote Al Gore) and, finally, Campaign Finance Reform (support any reform measure because it’s like saying you support Mothers Day).

Step 3: Deny. Even though the pack will be crowded at this stage, the long knives will be out, and your past becomes fair game. So, deny everything. Better yet, blame society or cigarette advertising. Cry if you do that. Have your wife/husband at your side. A kid in an iron lung would be good, too.

Step 4: Threaten a Foreign Country. Your choice here. (No, everyone can't choose France.) This begins the stage where candidates show their weltpolitik mettle by rattling sabers, nerves and such. You’ll be asked to invade a sovereign nation and explain your choice. Again, pick any little niggling principality that’s annoyed you since college when you got caught trying to buy hash there. Now, let loose a barrage. Just be ready to defend your actions or, better yet, blame the press.

Step 5: Cover Up a Lie. Contestants will be given a lie. Each contestant will then be placed under glaring lights in front of cameras and a microphone and asked to deny the obvious. Candidates will be judged on originality, ability to keep a straight face (avoid smirking) and obfuscation. Bonus points: Show undying support for a loyal supporter you're about to dispatch.

Step 6: Speech Skills. Candidates will be asked to prepare and deliver a policy speech (topics to be assigned later). Candidates who mispronounce “obfuscation” probably won’t make it into the final round. Mispronouncing “nuclear”, however, seems to be fine. In fact, may help.

Step 7: Fancy Dress Ball. Each candidate will be asked to plan a state dinner. Candidates will be judged on use of silverware, napkins and small talk with visiting dignitaries who smell like mothballs and are about as interesting to talk to as the Jell-O centerpiece.

Step 8: Sudden Death Round. A major world figure dies (Pope, King, your VP, a smarmy televangelist) and each candidate, without preparation, will have sixty seconds to say something non-offensive about the suddenly departed. Candidates will be judged on stammering, lip licking, pronunciation of the deceased person’s name and ability to end the statement with “our thoughts and prayers go out to his/her family.”

Step 9: Bathing Suit Contest. Eighty percent of your score can be earned, or lost, here. This is where Reality Voting © beats the Hillary/Rudy campaigns every time. So, tone up those abs, wax the naughty bits and ask your advisers what “banana hammock” means before some reporter sticks a microphone in your face demanding that you explain your banana-hammock policy.

Step 10: Stand-up and Sing. As the name implies, the finalist candidates will be asked to perform in public at our Dean Martin-Meets-The-Press gala. You and your fellow Blog Party © candidates will make absolute fools of yourselves through song, dance and Garrison Keillor skits as though willing to do anything to become the next Commander Guy.

Step 11: Call To Action--Vote. Get online and vote for your favorite Who Wants To Ride Air Force One? © candidate. Click the Comments link below.

Step 12: To Be Announced (TBA) as candidates stumble. It's a yellow-dog-eat-yellow-dog world where there's red and blue blood on the yellow snow.

Disclaimers & Disclarifications:
That’s the rough outline for Who Wants To Ride Air Force One? ©. It’s open to any native-born American (if your umbilical cord made it across the border, you’re in), age 35 and willing to live inside a fishbowl for the rest of his-slant-her life. Every waking moment of that life will dissected by blog-fogged pundits who can't get real jobs and secretly wish that they were the Blog Party’s first Commander Guy.

The best news--anyone can vote. And just like in New Jersey, the more you vote the better you feel.

The Reward: Power. Once in The White House, anytime you want to burn a few thousand gallons of jet fuel in your own Boeing 747, simply pick up the hot line to Andrews AFB (don’t confuse it with the hot line to some nuke silo in North Dakota, that's gets embarrassing) and say, “Commander Guy here, I feel like flying to…oh, Des Moines!” You won’t even need to call a cab, because like Enterprise they’ll pick you up.

Thank you.

Paul Berge
Blog Party © Host
"Party like it's 2008..."

Rejection Slip Theater 18A ©

2007-04-07T06:53:00.000-06:00

Hey, kids, wake up! It's time for Rejection Slip Theater ©, podcast Episode 18a and the continuing adventures of that 1929 barnstormer, Jake Hollow. He's still hot on the tail of foreign agents, spies, curvy dames armed with bullet brassieres and vaguely European accents. Yes, Jake Hollow, the self-assured, action-misadventure aviator with the Lucky Strike smile, comes in from the cold in Jake Hollow, Airmail Pilot ©, Chapter 4, written by Paul Berge and starring: Michael Cornelison as Jake, Annie Meacham as the breathless Mary Beth, Morgan Halgren as the spy, Joseph Pundzak as Ernie, Greg Anderson as Postal Commander Rockmander and Paul Berge as the Colonel. And as always, we hop into the 1956 Plymouth station wagon to head down the Garden State Parkway to Westwood, New Jersey 07675, exit 168, to visit Artie Azzetti and the Gang ©. It's a warm day in this 1959 neighborhood, a time before Mr. Rogers when kids had to rely upon the good graces of the The Good Humor Man ©. This was the first ever Artie Azzetti story (1 of about 50), written by Paul Berge in 1984, recorded in 1993 and appears on the album "Artie Azzetti & Me."© More importantly, it's all free for your listening pleasure when you click on: http://feeds.feedburner.com/rejectionsliptheater And, remember, kids: Tell your friends, because if you don't you'll be a douche bag. Sorry, that's the way it was in Jersey. Credits: Rejection Slip Theater (original © 1993), was created and produced by Joseph Pundzak and Paul Berge. Michael Meacham, Technical Director. Joseph Pundzak, Executive Producer. Original music by Jamie Poulsen. All Artie Azzetti and the Gang © stories were written and performed by Paul Berge. All original written stories remain the copyrighted property of the authors, used with permission by Rejection Slip Theater, which retains all rights to the audio productions. Most performers are available for voice work through Radio Garage in Urbandale, Iowa (http://www.radiogarage.com/). Some of the RST radioplays are available for theatrical production. Contact us for scripts, fees and copyrights at: rejectslip@aol.com Write "RST scripts" in the subject bar. No attachments, Fwd, viri or embedded messages, please, or the US Congress will waggle a non-binding finger at you so fast, buster, it'll...well, it'll do nothing. Our podcast guru is Dan Wardell. More RST podcasts at: http://feeds.feedburner.com/rejectionsliptheater RST web site and Contact Us: http://www.paulberge.com/ "Good night...or good morning. Whatever works."

Rejection Slip Theater ©, episode 17a

2007-03-24T12:06:00.000-06:00

Hey, kids, wake up! It's time for Rejection Slip Theater ©, podcast Episode 17a and the continuing adventures of that 1929 barnstormer, Jake Hollow. He's hot on the tail of foreign agents, spies, curvy dames armed with stiletto heals and vaguely European accents. Yes, Jake Hollow, the lantern-jawed action-misadventure aviator with the Lucky Strike smile, comes in from the cold in Jake Hollow, Airmail Pilot ©, Chapter 3, written by Paul Berge and starring: Michael Cornelison as Jake, Annie Meacham as the breathless Mary Beth, Morgan Halgren as the spy, Joseph Pundzak as Ernie, Greg Anderson as Postal Commander Rockmander and Paul Berge as the Colonel.
And as always, we hop into the '56 Plymouth station wagon to head down the Garden State Parkway to Westwood, New Jersey 07675, exit 168, to visit Artie Azzetti and the Gang ©. It's the opening day of Little League baseball, and in New Jersey, when you steal second, you get to keep it.
But there's no need to steal RST because, it's all free when you click on: http://feeds.feedburner.com/rejectionsliptheater And, remember, kids: Tell your friends! Credits: Rejection Slip Theater (original © 1993), was created and produced by Joseph Pundzak and Paul Berge. Michael Meacham, Technical Director. Joseph Pundzak, Executive Producer. Original music by Jamie Poulsen. All Artie Azzetti and the Gang © stories were written and performed by Paul Berge. All original written stories remain the copyrighted property of the authors, used with permission by Rejection Slip Theater, which retains all rights to the audio productions. Most performers are available for voice work through Radio Garage in Urbandale, Iowa (http://www.radiogarage.com/). Some of the RST radioplays are available for theatrical production. Contact us for scripts, fees and copyrights at: rejectslip@aol.com Write "RST scripts" in the subject bar. No attachments, Fwd, viri or embedded messages, please, or the US Congress will waggle a non-binding finger at you so fast, buster, it'll...well, it'll do nothing. Our podcast guru is Dan Wardell. More RST podcasts at: http://feeds.feedburner.com/rejectionsliptheater RST web site and Contact Us: http://www.paulberge.com/ "Good night...or good morning. Whatever works."

Rejection Slip Theater ©, podcast Episode 16 A

2007-03-13T10:23:00.000-06:00

Hey, kids, wake up! It's time for Rejection Slip Theater ©, podcast Episode 16 A. If you loved Bootleg Skies© and Inside The Circle©, you'll cheer, laugh and mostly cringe when you hear what's become of 1929 barnstormer, Jake Hollow. He's gone postal! Again! Yes, Jake Hollow, the lantern-jawed action-misadventure aviator with the Lucky Strike smile, re-emerges in Jake Hollow, Airmail Pilot ©, Chapter 2, written by Paul Berge and starring: Michael Cornelison as Jake, Annie Meacham as the breathless Mary Beth, Joseph Pundzak as Ernie, Greg Anderson as Postal Commander Rockmander and Paul Berge as the Colonel. (Jake Hollow, Airmail Pilot ©.) And as always, we hop into the '56 Plymouth wagon to head down the Garden State Parkway to Westwood, New Jersey 07675, exit 168, visit Artie Azzetti and the Gang ©. It's all free when you click on: http://feeds.feedburner.com/rejectionsliptheater And, remember, kids: Tell your friends!
Credits: Rejection Slip Theater (original © 1993), was created and produced by Joseph Pundzak and Paul Berge. Michael Meacham, Technical Director. Joseph Pundzak, Executive Producer. Original music by Jamie Poulsen. All Artie Azzetti and the Gang © stories were written and performed by Paul Berge. All original written stories remain the copyrighted property of the authors, used with permission by Rejection Slip Theater, which retains all rights to the audio productions. Most performers are available for voice work through Radio Garage in Urbandale, Iowa (http://www.radiogarage.com/). Some of the RST radioplays are available for theatrical production. Contact us for scripts, fees and copyrights at: rejectslip@aol.com Write "RST scripts" in the subject bar. No attachments, Fwd, viri or embedded messages, please, or the US Congress will waggle a non-binding finger at you so fast, buster, it'll...well, it'll do nothing. Our podcast guru is Dan Wardell. More RST podcasts at: http://feeds.feedburner.com/rejectionsliptheater RST web site and Contact Us: http://www.paulberge.com/ "Good night...or good morning. Whatever works."

Rejection Slip Theater, "Jake Hollow--Air Mail Pilot!"©

2007-02-20T08:01:00.000-06:00

Hey, kids, wake up! It's time for Rejection Slip Theater ©, podcast Episode 15 A.

If you loved Bootleg Skies©, you'll cheer, laugh and mostly cringe when you hear what's become of 1929 barnstormer, Jake Hollow. He's gone postal!

Yes, Jake Hollow, the lantern-jawed action-misadventure aviator with the Brilliantine smile, re-emerges in Jake Hollow, Airmail Pilot ©, Chapter 1, written by Paul Berge and starring: Michael Cornelison as Jake, Annie Meacham as the breathless Mary Beth, Joseph Pundzak as Ernie, Greg Anderson as Postal Commander Rockmander and Paul Berge as the Colonel. (Jake Hollow, Airmail Pilot ©, Chapter 1, first aired in 1994.)

And as always, we hop into the '56 Plymouth wagon to head down the Garden State Parkway to Westwood, New Jersey 07675, exit 168, where romance almost destroys Artie Azzetti and the Gang ©.

It's all straight ahead when you click on: http://feeds.feedburner.com/rejectionsliptheater And, remember, kids: Tell your friends!

Credits: Rejection Slip Theater (original © 1993), was created and produced by Joseph Pundzak and Paul Berge. Michael Meacham, Technical Director. Joseph Pundzak, Executive Producer. Original music by Jamie Poulsen. All Artie Azzetti and the Gang © stories were written and performed by Paul Berge. All original written stories remain the copyrighted property of the authors, used with permission by Rejection Slip Theater, which retains all rights to the audio productions. Most performers are available for voice work through Radio Garage in Urbandale, Iowa (http://www.radiogarage.com/). Some of the RST radioplays are available for theatrical production. Contact us for scripts, fees and copyrights at: rejectslip@aol.com Write "RST scripts" in the subject bar. No attachments, Fwd, viri or embedded messages, please, or the US Congress will waggle a non-binding finger at you so fast, buster, it'll...well, it'll do nothing. Our podcast guru is Dan Wardell. More RST podcasts at: http://feeds.feedburner.com/rejectionsliptheater RST web site and Contact Us: http://www.paulberge.com/ "Good night...or good morning. Whatever works."

Rejection Slip Theater "Valentine's Day Massacre" © 14A

2007-02-13T08:22:00.000-06:00

Hey, kids, wake up! It's time for Rejection Slip Theater ©, podcast Episode 14 A, the one your parents are still too traumatized to discuss while you're in the room. That's because it contains the infamous Valentine's Day Massacre with Artie Azzetti and the Gang ©, written and told by Paul Berge.

Actually, your parents are discussing s-e-x when you're not in the room, so to save them the embarrassment of pretending to explain it to you unaided by PowerPoint, sit them down, and as a family listen to the Rejection Slip Theater Valentine's Day episode.
It's all straight ahead when you click on: http://feeds.feedburner.com/rejectionsliptheater
And, remember, Kids: Tell your friends!

Credits: Rejection Slip Theater (original © 1993), was created and produced by Joseph Pundzak and Paul Berge. Michael Meacham, Technical Director. Joseph Pundzak, Executive Producer. Original music by Jamie Poulsen. All original written stories remain the copyrighted property of the authors, used with permission by Rejection Slip Theater, which retains all rights to the audio productions. Most performers are available for voice work through Radio Garage in Urbandale, Iowa (http://www.radiogarage.com/). Some of the RST radioplays are available for theatrical production. Contact us for fees and copyrights at: rejectslip@aol.com Write "RST scripts" in the subject bar. No attachments, Fwd, viri or embedded messages, please, or your computer mouse will eat your cat! Our podcast guru is Dan Wardell. More RST podcasts at: http://feeds.feedburner.com/rejectionsliptheater RST web site and Contact Us: http://www.paulberge.com/ "Good night...or good morning. Whatever works."

Rejection Slip Theater 13a ©

2007-02-07T07:10:00.000-06:00

Hey, kids, wake up! It's time for Rejection Slip Theater ©, podcast episode 13 A, in which actor Greg Anderson does some of his finest panicky delivery while attempting to fly a US Navy F4U Corsair fighter off an aircraft carrier--at night. You just can't get this quality realism on YouTube, MeTube, CheeseTube or any other visually-impaired medium. It takes radio (or in this case, podcast audio) to splash a mind movie across your imagination.
So, sit back, close your eyes--unless you're driving--and listen to Rejection Slip Theater's podcast episode 13A featuring: On The Wing written by Bill Durst, starring Greg Anderson and introducing Joe Parish.
And, of course, we head back in time to Westwood, New Jersey 07675 to visit Paul Berge's Artie Azzetti and the Gang © in Buy Und Get Out. And for all you Catholic school survivors willing to admit you still have a thing for plaid, we bring you Nunsuch Nonsense ©, written by Paul Berge and starring: Michael Cornelison, Carol Gale and Annie Meacham as the nun.
It's all straight ahead when you click on: http://feeds.feedburner.com/rejectionsliptheater

Credits: Rejection Slip Theater (original © 1993), was created and produced by Joseph Pundzak and Paul Berge. Michael Meacham, Technical Director. Joseph Pundzak, Executive Producer. Original music by Jamie Poulsen. All original written stories remain the copyrighted property of the authors, used with permission by Rejection Slip Theater, which retains all rights to the audio productions. Most performers are available for voice work through Radio Garage in Urbandale, Iowa (http://www.radiogarage.com/). Some of the RST radioplays are available for theatrical production. Contact us for fees and copyrights at: rejectslip@aol.com Write "RST scripts" in the subject bar. No attachments, Fwd, viri or embedded messages, please, or we'll report you to Homeland Insecurity and you'll never shampoo again! Our podcast guru is Dan Wardell. More RST podcasts at: http://feeds.feedburner.com/rejectionsliptheater RST web site and Contact Us: http://www.paulberge.com/ "Good night...or good morning. Whatever works."

Rejection Slip Theater Programs 10A, 11A and 12A...Canadian, eh?

2006-12-15T07:51:00.000-06:00

"Hey, Kids, wake up! It's time for..." Three hours of original Rejected Holiday Radio Drama, Comedy, Adventure--and a few castrated chipmunks roasting on an open fire--this Rejection Slip Theater Holiday Special ©, which first aired in 1994 on WHO News Radio 1040 AM, has it all.

We've clumped several years of RST Christmas Specials into one mother-of-all radio event and spread them over Programs 10A, 11A and 12A. There's enough holiday cheer and anxiety in this yule blog to raise Hunter Thompson from the near-dead and get you to rethinking the true meaning behind Frank Capra's It's A Wonderful Life. Fer instance, did you ever wonder why George Bailey--a real estate developer--was allegedly so wonderful? Think about it--he was rude to just about everyone, spoke with his mouthful at dinner and never explained to anyone (except his imaginary friend, the angel Clarence) where the $8000 went. Instead, he did what Baileys had been doing for generations, he shook down the good folks of Bedford Falls with vague threats of turning them out of their Bailey Park double-wides by hiking the interest on their adjustable-rate mortgages. And, sure he supposedly saved brother Harry from drowning in 1919, but whose dumb idea was it in the first place to go sledding (shoveling) on thin ice? Why, George Baileyoski's, that's whose? Hee-Haw! And did his buddy in the police department ever run George Bailey in for vandalizing that old Granville house...a house, mind you, that George Bailey was able to purchase at far less than market value after trashing it? I'm just saying...
Now, suppose the story had taken a different twist; perhaps, if George Bailey had received his wish to have never been born, would it be possible that upon returning to Bedford Falls/Pottersville that life there might have been better instead of worse without those Baileys?
Well, not to sprinkle ground glass on your Christmas pudding, but some of the Rejection Slip Theater staff writers have long pondered these issues. And while we couldn't answer them, our executive producer, Joseph Pundzak, did come up with a splendid holiday tale called, A Leveraged Christmas©. In the cast is just about every member of the Rejection Players, listed here in no particular order: Morgan Halgren, Richard Choate, Ric Johnson, Michael Meacham, Jamie Poulsen, Annie Meacham, Kathleen Berge, DVM (it's not every radio show that has a real veterinarian on staff)...and a whole bunch more.

But wait, there's more!
If you click through now to: http://feeds.feedburner.com/rejectionsliptheater
You'll not only get Joe Pundzak's The Leveraged Christmas, but you'll also be able to hear Paul Berge's Artie Azzetti Christmas © 1993, starring Artie Azzetti and the Gang© from Saint Anthony's Elementary School (some say it's a thinly disguised St. Andrews Grammar School) in Westwood, New Jersey 07675 (Exit 168 on the Garden State Parkway or #165 if you want to save a toll).

Credits: Rejection Slip Theater (original © 1993), was created and produced by Joseph Pundzak and Paul Berge. Michael Meacham, Technical Director. Joseph Pundzak, Executive Producer. Original music by Jamie Poulsen. All original written stories remain the copyrighted property of the authors, used with permission by Rejection Slip Theater, which retains all rights to the audio productions. Most performers are available for voice work through Radio Garage in Urbandale, Iowa (http://www.radiogarage.com/).
Some of the RST radioplays are available for theatrical production. Contact us for fees and copyrights at: rejectslip@aol.com Write "RST scripts" in the subject bar. No attachments, Fwd, viri or embedded messages, please, or we'll report you to Sister Belladona, and you'll be in detention so fast it'll make your hat spin, mister!
Our podcast guru is Dan Wardell.
More RST podcasts at: http://feeds.feedburner.com/rejectionsliptheater RST web site and Contact Us: http://www.paulberge.com/
"Good night...or good morning. Whatever works."

Rejection Slip Theater Program 9A

2006-12-10T09:06:00.000-06:00

Hey, kids, wake up! It's time for Rejection Slip Theater ©, podcast Episode 9A (http://feeds.feedburner.com/rejectionsliptheater ), originally aired in 1994, presents the final chapter in the continuing adventures of Frank Taylor and Reginald Barker III in "China Seas©." Um...delay that, if this is the final chapter then I guess it won't be continuing...until Ron Howard buys the mind-movie rights, that is, and then, by gum, it'll continue.

"China Seas" © was written by Paul Berge (under the pen name, Armand Cassandra). "China Seas" cast: Richard Choate, Michael Cornelison, Patti Choate, Carol Gale, Ed Weiss

Coming Soon: Hey, Kids, wake up! The "Rejection Slip Theater annual Christmas Special"©, complete with a Chanukah solo, is coming up just in time for...well, for Christmas and Chanukah. So, keep watching your pod radio dial and remember to set your clocks back to Christmas/Chanukah 1964 for a holiday treat full of trans fats, rejected scripts and produced in an secondhand Easy Bake Oven.

Credits: Rejection Slip Theater (original © 1993), was created and produced by Joseph Pundzak and Paul Berge. Michael Meacham, Technical Director. Joseph Pundzak, Executive Producer. Original music by Jamie Poulsen. All original written stories remain the copyrighted property of the authors, used with permission by Rejection Slip Theater, which retains all rights to the audio productions. Most performers are available for voice work through Radio Garage in Urbandale, Iowa (http://www.radiogarage.com/). Some of the RST radioplays are available for theatrical production. Contact us for fees and copyrights at: rejectslip@aol.com Write "RST scripts" in the subject bar. No attachments, Fwd, viri or embedded messages, please, or we'll report you to Iowa Rejected Writers Workshop! Our podcast guru is Dan Wardell. More RST podcasts at: http://feeds.feedburner.com/rejectionsliptheater RST web site and Contact Us: http://www.paulberge.com/ "Good night...or good morning. Whatever works."

Rejection Slip Theater Program 8A Thanksgiving Special

2006-11-22T08:09:00.001-06:00

Rejection Slip Theater © episode 8A (http://feeds.feedburner.com/rejectionsliptheater ), originally aired in 1994. This is the Thanksgiving Special starring Perry Como, Richard M. Nixon, and the Peter Gennaro Dancers...okay, we lied. We couldn't book the dancers due to some union problems and complaints about dressing room heating at the Rejection Slip Radio Theater (tm). We also lied about Como and Nixon, but, then again, who hasn't? Still, despite the lies, the show must go on as it first did in 1994.
So, hear now: the Rejection Slip Theater Thanksgiving Special © featuring (and we aren't lying here) Artie Azzetti and Gang © from Westwood, New Jersey, in a Thanksgiving misadventure, inspired in part by a true event in the life of RST executive producer, Joseph Pundzak, as written and performed by RST's host, Paul Berge. Plus, Home For the Holidays © with Carole Gale.

Credits: Rejection Slip Theater (original © 1993), was created and produced by Joseph Pundzak and Paul Berge. Michael Meacham, Technical Director. Joseph Pundzak, Executive Producer. Original music by Jamie Poulsen. All original written stories remain the copyrighted property of the authors, used with permission by Rejection Slip Theater, which retains all rights to the audio productions. Most performers are available for voice work through Radio Garage in Urbandale, Iowa (http://www.radiogarage.com/). Some of the RST radioplays are available for theatrical production. Contact us for fees and copyrights at: rejectslip@aol.com Write "RST scripts" in the subject bar. No attachments, Fwd, viri or embedded messages, please, or we'll report you to the Turkey Hotline! Our podcast guru is Dan Wardell. More RST podcasts at: http://feeds.feedburner.com/rejectionsliptheater RST web site and Contact Us: http://www.paulberge.com/ "Good night...or good morning. Whatever works."

Pumpkin Bombing

2006-11-20T07:32:00.000-06:00

One of the most frequently asked question at Rejection Slip Theater's monthly rejected writers' retreat and wine-tasting sponsored by the Southern Iowa Writer's Institute (located just above the Tai Kwon Do Academy on the corner of Euclid and Main in Osceola, Iowa) is really multifaceted: "Does pumpkin bombing truly exist? If so, where? Can it support an entire novel? Are obligatory sex scenes necessary? Should pumpkin-bombing be hyphenated? Do recent reports of rouge deer charging about Target stores in Des Moines, Iowa with pumpkins on their heads indicate an upsurge in pumpkin-bombing-related activities? If pumpkins were banned would only criminals possess pumpkins?

Good questions, all. We'll take them in reverse order:
1) If pumpkins were banned would only criminals posses pumpkins? No, the Second Amendment requires bears, too, to keep pumpkins...plus limit comma usage and ellipses, but, more importantly, it prohibits use of the subjunctive except by a well-regulated literary militia.
2) Do recent reports of rouge deer charging about Target stores in Des Moines, Iowa with pumpkins covering their heads indicate an upsurge in pumpkin bombing related activities? Perhaps. But it's rogue deer not rouge deer. And it's Des Moines where anything is possible, especially when it comes to headgear.
3) Should pumpkin-bombing be hyphenated? If you're anal-retentive, yes.
4) Are obligatory sex scenes necessary? Only if you want to get published. If you want to get your pumpkin story rejected and straight to RST, then obfuscate the naughty allusions.
5) Can it (pumpkin bombing) support an entire novel? We assume the questioner meant: Can it keep the reader's attention through 427 pages, excluding epilogues and footnotes, because nobody reads those? In that case, yes. See Bootleg Skies. Read a sample chapter: http://www.ailerona.com/documents/BootlegSkiesCh1.pdf
5) Shouldn't this be question #6? Yes.
7) Finally: Does pumpkin bombing truly exist? If so, where? It certainly does, Ollie, and where else but in southern Iowa: http://www.avweb.com/news/skywrite/188626-1.html

Credits: Rejection Slip Theater (original © 1993), was created and produced by Joseph Pundzak and Paul Berge. Michael Meacham, Technical Director. Joseph Pundzak, Executive Producer. Original music by Jamie Poulsen. All original written stories remain the copyrighted property of the authors, used with permission by Rejection Slip Theater, which retains all rights to the audio productions. Most performers are available for voice work through Radio Garage in Urbandale, Iowa (http://www.radiogarage.com/). Some of the RST radioplays are available for theatrical production. Contact us for fees and copyrights at: rejectslip@aol.com Write "RST scripts" in the subject bar. No attachments, Fwd, viri or embedded messages, please, or we'll report you to Col. Sparky and you'll never smash pumpkins again! Our podcast guru is Dan Wardell. More RST podcasts at: http://feeds.feedburner.com/rejectionsliptheater RST web site and Contact Us: http://www.paulberge.com/ "Good night...or good morning. Whatever works."

Rejection Slip Theater Program 7A

2006-11-13T17:59:00.000-06:00

Rejection Slip Theater © episode 7A (http://feeds.feedburner.com/rejectionsliptheater ), originally aired in 1994, presents the continuing adventures of Frank Taylor and Reginald Barker III in "China Seas." ©
"China Seas" was written by Paul Berge (under the pen name, Armand Cassandra).
"China Seas" cast: Richard Choate, Michael Cornelison, Patti Choate, Carol Gale, Ed Weiss

"Night Light" was written by...well, by someone, but I've misplaced my notes so I'll have to come back to this. It no doubt has a stellar cast, but that list, too, was on the same cocktail napkin as the author credits. Still, I know it's a great story by a fine rejected author because RST wouldn't have unrejected it if it weren't...and you have to admit it took some courage to use the subjunctive there. So, just listen to Episode 7A and this will make more sense. After that, please drop us a note saying who wrote "Night Light" and who's in the cast. (This is so embarrassing.) http://feeds.feedburner.com/rejectionsliptheater

Speaking of embarrassing, we return again to Westwood, New Jersey, circa 1963, for the continuing Adventures of Artie Azzetti and the Gang © as they build a "Tree Fort," written and performed by Paul Berge.

Credits: Rejection Slip Theater (original © 1993), was created and produced by Joseph Pundzak and Paul Berge. Michael Meacham, Technical Director. Joseph Pundzak, Executive Producer. Original music by Jamie Poulsen. All original written stories remain the copyrighted property of the authors, used with permission by Rejection Slip Theater, which retains all rights to the audio productions. Most performers are available for voice work through Radio Garage in Urbandale, Iowa (http://www.radiogarage.com/). Some of the RST radioplays are available for theatrical production. Contact us for fees and copyrights at: rejectslip@aol.com Write "RST scripts" in the subject bar. No attachments, Fwd, viri or embedded messages, please, or we'll report you to the pod cops! Our podcast guru is Dan Wardell. More RST podcasts at: http://feeds.feedburner.com/rejectionsliptheater RST web site and Contact Us: http://www.paulberge.com/ "Good night...or good morning. Whatever works."

Rejection Slip Theater Program 6A, The Halloween Special

2006-11-13T17:36:00.000-06:00

The Rejection Slip Theater Halloween Special © (http://feeds.feedburner.com/rejectionsliptheater ) first aired on October 30, 1994 on Newsradio 1040 AM.

The lineup:
"Mind Bender," written by Kevin Mayer or Norwalk, Iowa was adapted for radio by RST.
Cast: Linda Blakely, John Busbee, Patti Choate, Paul Berge, Greg Anderson, and Ed Weiss.

"Trick or Treat," the Artie Azzetti Halloween 1963 story set in Westwood, New Jersey by Paul Berge. Included in the cast are: Greg Anderson, Doug Hawley, Richard Choate, and Morgan Halgren as Mrs. Azzetti.

"Recovery," written by Michael Cornelison under the pen name Doug Fountain. Cast: Michael Cornelison, Greg Anderson, Annie Meacham, Doug Hawley and Paul Berge.

Dedicated to the memory of: Ed Weiss and Doug Hawley.

Credits: Rejection Slip Theater (original © 1993), was created and produced by Joseph Pundzak and Paul Berge. Michael Meacham, Technical Director. Joseph Pundzak, Executive Producer. Michael Cornelison, Director. Dr. B. Lugosi, Phlebotomy Advisor. Original music by Jamie Poulsen. All original written stories remain the copyrighted property of the authors, used with permission by Rejection Slip Theater, which retains all rights to the audio productions. Most performers are available for voice work through Radio Garage in Urbandale, Iowa (http://www.radiogarage.com/). Our podcast guru is Dan Wardell.
More RST podcasts at: http://feeds.feedburner.com/rejectionsliptheater
RST web site and Contact Us: http://www.paulberge.com/

Rejection Slip Theater Program 5A, 1994, 1995

2006-11-13T17:04:00.000-06:00

Rejection Slip Theater © Episode 5 A contains (http://feeds.feedburner.com/rejectionsliptheater):

Part 2 of "China Seas" starring Richard Choate , Michael Cornelison, Carol Gale and Ed Weiss. China Seas was written by Paul Berge under the pen name, Armand Cassandra.

"Neicy" Written by Barby Gatschet. Cast: Morgan Halgren and Michael Cornelison.

This week's Adventure of Artie Azzetti and the Gang © is called, "Snow Days," written and performed by Paul Berge. In the proto-spirit of No Child Left Behind, Artie Azzetti explains how to cancel school using the forces of nature, a little Voodoo and your imagination.

Credits: Rejection Slip Theater (original © 1993), was created and produced by Joseph Pundzak and Paul Berge. Michael Meacham, Technical Director. Joseph Pundzak, Executive Producer. Michael Cornelison, Director. Original music by Jamie Poulsen. All original written stories remain the copyrighted property of the authors, used with permission by Rejection Slip Theater, which retains all rights to the audio productions. Most performers are available for voice work through Radio Garage in Urbandale, Iowa (http://www.radiogarage.com/). Our podcast guru is Dan Wardell.
More RST podcasts at: http://feeds.feedburner.com/rejectionsliptheater
RST web site and Contact Us: http://www.paulberge.com/

2006-11-13T11:59:00.000-06:00

Rejection Slip Theater episode 4A© (http://feeds.feedburner.com/rejectionsliptheater ) first aired in 1994 and included RST's first attempt at serial drama in "China Seas." Although written by Paul Berge, it aired under the pen name: Armand Cassandra. The cast of "China Seas Parts" included: Richard Choate, Michael Cornelison, Ed Weiss, Greg Anderson, Paul Berge, Carole Gale.

Leading off RST episode 4A is "Paper or Plastic" © written by Valarie Richard Torrion (aka Paul Berge) and in the cast are: Annie Meacham, Greg Anderson and Patti Choate. NBC's Today Show was in the studio (Avatar) the Monday evening in early 1994 when RST recorded "Paper or Plastic" and taped the session. If anyone has a copy of that show, we'd love to see it again. It aired in the spring of 1994.

This week's trip to visit Artie Azzetti and the Gang © in Westwood, New Jersey is called "Go-Karts," written and performed by Paul Berge.

Credits: Rejection Slip Theater (original © 1993), was created and produced by Joseph Pundzak and Paul Berge. Michael Meacham, Technical Director. Joseph Pundzak, Executive Producer. Michael Cornelison, Director, Bill Clinton, POTUS. Original music by Jamie Poulsen. All original written stories remain the copyrighted property of the authors, used with permission by Rejection Slip Theater, which retains all rights to the audio productions. Most performers are available for voice work through Radio Garage in Urbandale, Iowa (http://www.radiogarage.com/). Our podcast guru is Dan Wardell. More RST podcasts at: http://feeds.feedburner.com/rejectionsliptheater RST web site and Contact Us: http://www.paulberge.com/

2006-11-13T11:28:00.000-06:00

Rejection Slip Theater © Episode 3A (http://feeds.feedburner.com/rejectionsliptheater ), first aired in 1994, includes:
"Action News Never Sleeps" a horror mind movie about an air traffic controller in serious need of a good night's sleep. Written by Paul Berge (an FAA air traffic controller himself from 1979 to 1997). The cast: Richard Choate and Wayne Oleson.
"Memory of the Revolution" stars: Morgan Halgren (yeah, the Morgan Halgren of Iowa Public Television--IPTV--"Living in Iowa" fame).
"Best Laid Plans" stars Patty Dunning, Michael Cornelison (yup, the same Michael Cornelison who co-starred in Max Allan Collins' movie, Mommy and the Stephen King movie The Woman In The Room, directed by Frank Darabont), plus Greg Anderson and Ric Johnson, two of the deepest voices in radio. They make James Earl Jones sound like a sissy tenor.
And this week's visit to Artie Azzetti and the Gang © in Westwood, New Jersey, 1964, is titled, "Call The Beatles," written and performed by Paul Berge.

Credits: Rejection Slip Theater © 1993, was created and produced by Joseph Pundzak and Paul Berge. Michael Meacham, Technical Director. Joseph Pundzak, Executive Producer. Michael Cornelison, Director, Bill Clinton, POTUS. Original music by Jamie Poulsen. All original written stories remain the copyrighted property of the authors, used with permission by Rejection Slip Theater, which retains all rights to the audio productions. Most performers are available for voice work through Radio Garage in Urbandale, Iowa (http://www.radiogarage.com/). Our podcast guru is Dan Wardell. More RST podcasts at: http://feeds.feedburner.com/rejectionsliptheater RST web site and Contact Us: http://www.paulberge.com/

Rejection Slip Theater Program 2A

2006-11-13T10:52:00.000-06:00

Rejection Slip Theater © Episode 2A, first aired on 9/15/96, features:
"Georgia" written by Jean Russell Larson of Marshalltown, Iowa and was narrated by Patti Choate. It features Ric Johnson, Annie Meacham, Doug Hawley, Richard Choate and Chuck Grady.

"Harvester" by Erik Mark Anlyn, features Richard Choate, Ric Johnson and John Busbee.

Plus Artie Azzetti and the Gang check in from Westwood, New Jersey in an episode called, "That's Life" ©, written and performed by Paul Berge.

Credits: Rejection Slip Theater © 1993, was created and produced by Joseph Pundzak and Paul Berge. Michael Meacham, Technical Director. Joseph Pundzak, Executive Producer. Michael Cornelison, Director, Bill Clinton, POTUS. Original music by Jamie Poulsen. All original written stories remain the copyrighted property of the authors, used with permission by Rejection Slip Theater, which retains all rights to the audio productions. Most performers are available for voice work through Radio Garage in Urbandale, Iowa (www.radiogarage.com). Our podcast guru is Dan Wardell. More RST podcasts at: http://feeds.feedburner.com/rejectionsliptheater
RST web site and Contact Us: www.paulberge.com

2006-11-12T08:53:00.001-06:00

Rejection Slip Theater Episode 1A © (http://feeds.feedburner.com/rejectionsliptheater) was originally aired in early 1994. The four stories include:
1) "The Mosquito Hunters" written by Poe Ballantine of Ames, Iowa was adapted for radio by Joe Pundak. Cast: Greg Anderson, Paul Berge, Tanya Ahmed, Dan Chase. The 18-pound mosquito provided by Michael Meacham.
2) "Rottweiller" written by B. John Burns of LaJolla, California. Adapted for radio by RST. Cast: Mike Meacham, Annie Meacham, Ed Weiss, Joseph Pundzak.
3) Artie Azzetti©: "A Gang is Born" Written and performed by Paul Berge. Set in a drain sewer in Westwood, New Jersey around 1963. This was not the first Artie Azzetti story ever aired. The first was "Good Humor Man," set in 1959 and aired in 1993. It'll appear in some future podcast.
4) "Revelation" written by Dr. Carole Soderblom of Indianola, Iowa. Adapted for radio by Paul Berge. Cast: Richard Choate, Morgan Halgren, Annie Meacham.

Credits: Rejection Slip Theater © was created and produced by Joseph Pundzak and Paul Berge. Michael Meacham, Technical Director. Joseph Pundzak, Executive Producer. Michael Cornelison, Director. Original music by Jamie Poulsen. Original sin by Adam & Eve. All original written stories remain the copyrighted property of the authors, used with permission by Rejection Slip Theater, which retains all rights to the audio productions. All performers, except Joey, Pauly and Mikey, were paid $1...yup, one buck per performance. Most performers are available for voice work through Radio Garage in Urbandale, Iowa. They charge more than a buck, now, though.
Our podcast guru is Dan Wardell.
More RST podcasts at: http://feeds.feedburner.com/rejectionsliptheater
RST web site: http://www.paulberge.com/

2006-11-11T17:28:00.000-06:00

Hey, kids, wake up. It's time, once again, for Rejection Slip Theater ©, the only radio drama series devoted to unrejected rejected literary works previously condemned to obscurity by a publisher's cold-hearted rejection slip. What writer doesn't have a stack of rejections slips stashed inside the closet (okay, other than Stephen King) ? And what writer doesn't dream of exacting revenge. Well, here it is, just as it once was, and ever shall be, the rejected writer's revenge:

Rejection Slip Theater © aired on WHO 1040 NewsRadio from 1993 to 2003. It's now podcast at: http://feeds.feedburner.com/rejectionsliptheater where you can download and listen to all 80 or so of the archived--and severely copyrighted--"mind movie" episodes absolutely free, provided you promise (put your hand on the computer) to tell your friends. Rejection Slip Theater © (aka RST) is radio drama, comedy, adventure, romance, sci-fi, westerns, crime-fighting nuns and a whole lot more as produced by Joseph Pundzak, Paul Berge and Michael Meacham. </FONT>

Based on the silly notion that literary works rejected by publishers needed a place to be aired, RST solicited rejected manuscripts from listeners and unrejected many of them. Soon the rejected writers were able to "hear their names in lights."
All unrejected stories were adapted for radio--not as skits, fer cryin' out loud (we're not Prairie Home Companion)--and performed by professional radio actors known as The Rejection Players ©. Included in the cast were: Morgan Halgren, Michael Cornelison, Rob Dillard, Linda Blakely, Richard and Patty Choate...plus dozens more actors reviving the lost art of radio theater.

Rejection Slip Theater © was created by Paul Berge and Joseph Pundzak in 1993 when Joey said to Pauly: "Hey, Pauly, wanna have a radio drama show with radio actors, sound effects, music and everything?" And, Pauly, being easily led into dubious theatrical adventures said, "Swell, Joey! Can I write and host it?" To which Joey said, "That'd be swell!" And they spit and shook hands to seal the deal. Recognizing that spit wouldn't be enough Joey and Pauly teamed with Mikey Meacham (now of Radio Garage in Urbandale, Iowa) to produce what, frankly, is some of the best and the weirdest radio theater ever recorded, so weird that the NBC Today Show did a story about the troupe in the spring of 1994. The early shows were aired on Sundays at midnight on an FM station in Des Moines, Iowa. Joe paid for the air time. It's said that Joe Pundzak and Paul Berge were the only ones listening that first night. Eventually, insomniacs, prison inmates and all-night, stop-n'-rob clerks joined the audience. By early 1994, Van Harden at WHO Newsradio 1040 AM invited RST into the big time. Armed with 50,000 watts and a 9 PM Sunday night slot, RST took off like a North Korean scud missile.

Bonus: Each RST episode usually includes a chapter of Paul Berge's "The Adventures of Artie Azzetti and Me" © about growing up in Westwood, New Jersey 07675.

This blog is new and under development--meaning, I'm just trying to figure out how it works. So, while I bumble about, please visit the RST official podcast site: http://feeds.feedburner.com/rejectionsliptheater
Or our home website at http://www.paulberge.com/

Enjoy and until next time, "Good night or good morning...whatever works." (Official trade phrase of RST; must be said in a deep radio voice as though you really really mean it even if you don't quite understand it.)