Friday, December 15, 2006

Rejection Slip Theater Programs 10A, 11A and 12A...Canadian, eh?

"Hey, Kids, wake up! It's time for..." Three hours of original Rejected Holiday Radio Drama, Comedy, Adventure--and a few castrated chipmunks roasting on an open fire--this Rejection Slip Theater Holiday Special ©, which first aired in 1994 on WHO News Radio 1040 AM, has it all.

We've clumped several years of RST Christmas Specials into one mother-of-all radio event and spread them over Programs 10A, 11A and 12A. There's enough holiday cheer and anxiety in this yule blog to raise Hunter Thompson from the near-dead and get you to rethinking the true meaning behind Frank Capra's It's A Wonderful Life. Fer instance, did you ever wonder why George Bailey--a real estate developer--was allegedly so wonderful? Think about it--he was rude to just about everyone, spoke with his mouthful at dinner and never explained to anyone (except his imaginary friend, the angel Clarence) where the $8000 went. Instead, he did what Baileys had been doing for generations, he shook down the good folks of Bedford Falls with vague threats of turning them out of their Bailey Park double-wides by hiking the interest on their adjustable-rate mortgages. And, sure he supposedly saved brother Harry from drowning in 1919, but whose dumb idea was it in the first place to go sledding (shoveling) on thin ice? Why, George Baileyoski's, that's whose? Hee-Haw! And did his buddy in the police department ever run George Bailey in for vandalizing that old Granville house...a house, mind you, that George Bailey was able to purchase at far less than market value after trashing it? I'm just saying...
Now, suppose the story had taken a different twist; perhaps, if George Bailey had received his wish to have never been born, would it be possible that upon returning to Bedford Falls/Pottersville that life there might have been better instead of worse without those Baileys?
Well, not to sprinkle ground glass on your Christmas pudding, but some of the Rejection Slip Theater staff writers have long pondered these issues. And while we couldn't answer them, our executive producer, Joseph Pundzak, did come up with a splendid holiday tale called, A Leveraged Christmas©. In the cast is just about every member of the Rejection Players, listed here in no particular order: Morgan Halgren, Richard Choate, Ric Johnson, Michael Meacham, Jamie Poulsen, Annie Meacham, Kathleen Berge, DVM (it's not every radio show that has a real veterinarian on staff)...and a whole bunch more.

But wait, there's more!
If you click through now to: http://feeds.feedburner.com/rejectionsliptheater
You'll not only get Joe Pundzak's The Leveraged Christmas, but you'll also be able to hear Paul Berge's Artie Azzetti Christmas © 1993, starring Artie Azzetti and the Gang© from Saint Anthony's Elementary School (some say it's a thinly disguised St. Andrews Grammar School) in Westwood, New Jersey 07675 (Exit 168 on the Garden State Parkway or #165 if you want to save a toll).

Credits: Rejection Slip Theater (original © 1993), was created and produced by Joseph Pundzak and Paul Berge. Michael Meacham, Technical Director. Joseph Pundzak, Executive Producer. Original music by Jamie Poulsen. All original written stories remain the copyrighted property of the authors, used with permission by Rejection Slip Theater, which retains all rights to the audio productions. Most performers are available for voice work through Radio Garage in Urbandale, Iowa (http://www.radiogarage.com/).
Some of the RST radioplays are available for theatrical production. Contact us for fees and copyrights at: rejectslip@aol.com Write "RST scripts" in the subject bar. No attachments, Fwd, viri or embedded messages, please, or we'll report you to Sister Belladona, and you'll be in detention so fast it'll make your hat spin, mister!
Our podcast guru is Dan Wardell.
More RST podcasts at: http://feeds.feedburner.com/rejectionsliptheater RST web site and Contact Us: http://www.paulberge.com/
"Good night...or good morning. Whatever works."

Sunday, December 10, 2006

Rejection Slip Theater Program 9A

Hey, kids, wake up! It's time for Rejection Slip Theater ©, podcast Episode 9A (http://feeds.feedburner.com/rejectionsliptheater ), originally aired in 1994, presents the final chapter in the continuing adventures of Frank Taylor and Reginald Barker III in "China Seas©." Um...delay that, if this is the final chapter then I guess it won't be continuing...until Ron Howard buys the mind-movie rights, that is, and then, by gum, it'll continue.

"China Seas" © was written by Paul Berge (under the pen name, Armand Cassandra). "China Seas" cast: Richard Choate, Michael Cornelison, Patti Choate, Carol Gale, Ed Weiss

Coming Soon: Hey, Kids, wake up! The "Rejection Slip Theater annual Christmas Special"©, complete with a Chanukah solo, is coming up just in time for...well, for Christmas and Chanukah. So, keep watching your pod radio dial and remember to set your clocks back to Christmas/Chanukah 1964 for a holiday treat full of trans fats, rejected scripts and produced in an secondhand Easy Bake Oven.

Credits: Rejection Slip Theater (original © 1993), was created and produced by Joseph Pundzak and Paul Berge. Michael Meacham, Technical Director. Joseph Pundzak, Executive Producer. Original music by Jamie Poulsen. All original written stories remain the copyrighted property of the authors, used with permission by Rejection Slip Theater, which retains all rights to the audio productions. Most performers are available for voice work through Radio Garage in Urbandale, Iowa (http://www.radiogarage.com/). Some of the RST radioplays are available for theatrical production. Contact us for fees and copyrights at: rejectslip@aol.com Write "RST scripts" in the subject bar. No attachments, Fwd, viri or embedded messages, please, or we'll report you to Iowa Rejected Writers Workshop! Our podcast guru is Dan Wardell. More RST podcasts at: http://feeds.feedburner.com/rejectionsliptheater RST web site and Contact Us: http://www.paulberge.com/ "Good night...or good morning. Whatever works."

Wednesday, November 22, 2006

Rejection Slip Theater Program 8A Thanksgiving Special

Rejection Slip Theater © episode 8A (http://feeds.feedburner.com/rejectionsliptheater ), originally aired in 1994. This is the Thanksgiving Special starring Perry Como, Richard M. Nixon, and the Peter Gennaro Dancers...okay, we lied. We couldn't book the dancers due to some union problems and complaints about dressing room heating at the Rejection Slip Radio Theater (tm). We also lied about Como and Nixon, but, then again, who hasn't? Still, despite the lies, the show must go on as it first did in 1994.
So, hear now: the Rejection Slip Theater Thanksgiving Special © featuring (and we aren't lying here) Artie Azzetti and Gang © from Westwood, New Jersey, in a Thanksgiving misadventure, inspired in part by a true event in the life of RST executive producer, Joseph Pundzak, as written and performed by RST's host, Paul Berge. Plus, Home For the Holidays © with Carole Gale.

Credits: Rejection Slip Theater (original © 1993), was created and produced by Joseph Pundzak and Paul Berge. Michael Meacham, Technical Director. Joseph Pundzak, Executive Producer. Original music by Jamie Poulsen. All original written stories remain the copyrighted property of the authors, used with permission by Rejection Slip Theater, which retains all rights to the audio productions. Most performers are available for voice work through Radio Garage in Urbandale, Iowa (http://www.radiogarage.com/). Some of the RST radioplays are available for theatrical production. Contact us for fees and copyrights at: rejectslip@aol.com Write "RST scripts" in the subject bar. No attachments, Fwd, viri or embedded messages, please, or we'll report you to the Turkey Hotline! Our podcast guru is Dan Wardell. More RST podcasts at: http://feeds.feedburner.com/rejectionsliptheater RST web site and Contact Us: http://www.paulberge.com/ "Good night...or good morning. Whatever works."

Monday, November 20, 2006

Pumpkin Bombing

One of the most frequently asked question at Rejection Slip Theater's monthly rejected writers' retreat and wine-tasting sponsored by the Southern Iowa Writer's Institute (located just above the Tai Kwon Do Academy on the corner of Euclid and Main in Osceola, Iowa) is really multifaceted: "Does pumpkin bombing truly exist? If so, where? Can it support an entire novel? Are obligatory sex scenes necessary? Should pumpkin-bombing be hyphenated? Do recent reports of rouge deer charging about Target stores in Des Moines, Iowa with pumpkins on their heads indicate an upsurge in pumpkin-bombing-related activities? If pumpkins were banned would only criminals possess pumpkins?

Good questions, all. We'll take them in reverse order:
1) If pumpkins were banned would only criminals posses pumpkins? No, the Second Amendment requires bears, too, to keep pumpkins...plus limit comma usage and ellipses, but, more importantly, it prohibits use of the subjunctive except by a well-regulated literary militia.
2) Do recent reports of rouge deer charging about Target stores in Des Moines, Iowa with pumpkins covering their heads indicate an upsurge in pumpkin bombing related activities? Perhaps. But it's rogue deer not rouge deer. And it's Des Moines where anything is possible, especially when it comes to headgear.
3) Should pumpkin-bombing be hyphenated? If you're anal-retentive, yes.
4) Are obligatory sex scenes necessary? Only if you want to get published. If you want to get your pumpkin story rejected and straight to RST, then obfuscate the naughty allusions.
5) Can it (pumpkin bombing) support an entire novel? We assume the questioner meant: Can it keep the reader's attention through 427 pages, excluding epilogues and footnotes, because nobody reads those? In that case, yes. See Bootleg Skies. Read a sample chapter: http://www.ailerona.com/documents/BootlegSkiesCh1.pdf
5) Shouldn't this be question #6? Yes.
7) Finally: Does pumpkin bombing truly exist? If so, where? It certainly does, Ollie, and where else but in southern Iowa: http://www.avweb.com/news/skywrite/188626-1.html

Credits: Rejection Slip Theater (original © 1993), was created and produced by Joseph Pundzak and Paul Berge. Michael Meacham, Technical Director. Joseph Pundzak, Executive Producer. Original music by Jamie Poulsen. All original written stories remain the copyrighted property of the authors, used with permission by Rejection Slip Theater, which retains all rights to the audio productions. Most performers are available for voice work through Radio Garage in Urbandale, Iowa (http://www.radiogarage.com/). Some of the RST radioplays are available for theatrical production. Contact us for fees and copyrights at: rejectslip@aol.com Write "RST scripts" in the subject bar. No attachments, Fwd, viri or embedded messages, please, or we'll report you to Col. Sparky and you'll never smash pumpkins again! Our podcast guru is Dan Wardell. More RST podcasts at: http://feeds.feedburner.com/rejectionsliptheater RST web site and Contact Us: http://www.paulberge.com/ "Good night...or good morning. Whatever works."

Monday, November 13, 2006

Rejection Slip Theater Program 7A

Rejection Slip Theater © episode 7A (http://feeds.feedburner.com/rejectionsliptheater ), originally aired in 1994, presents the continuing adventures of Frank Taylor and Reginald Barker III in "China Seas." ©
"China Seas" was written by Paul Berge (under the pen name, Armand Cassandra).
"China Seas" cast: Richard Choate, Michael Cornelison, Patti Choate, Carol Gale, Ed Weiss

"Night Light" was written by...well, by someone, but I've misplaced my notes so I'll have to come back to this. It no doubt has a stellar cast, but that list, too, was on the same cocktail napkin as the author credits. Still, I know it's a great story by a fine rejected author because RST wouldn't have unrejected it if it weren't...and you have to admit it took some courage to use the subjunctive there. So, just listen to Episode 7A and this will make more sense. After that, please drop us a note saying who wrote "Night Light" and who's in the cast. (This is so embarrassing.) http://feeds.feedburner.com/rejectionsliptheater

Speaking of embarrassing, we return again to Westwood, New Jersey, circa 1963, for the continuing Adventures of Artie Azzetti and the Gang © as they build a "Tree Fort," written and performed by Paul Berge.

Credits: Rejection Slip Theater (original © 1993), was created and produced by Joseph Pundzak and Paul Berge. Michael Meacham, Technical Director. Joseph Pundzak, Executive Producer. Original music by Jamie Poulsen. All original written stories remain the copyrighted property of the authors, used with permission by Rejection Slip Theater, which retains all rights to the audio productions. Most performers are available for voice work through Radio Garage in Urbandale, Iowa (http://www.radiogarage.com/). Some of the RST radioplays are available for theatrical production. Contact us for fees and copyrights at: rejectslip@aol.com Write "RST scripts" in the subject bar. No attachments, Fwd, viri or embedded messages, please, or we'll report you to the pod cops! Our podcast guru is Dan Wardell. More RST podcasts at: http://feeds.feedburner.com/rejectionsliptheater RST web site and Contact Us: http://www.paulberge.com/ "Good night...or good morning. Whatever works."

Rejection Slip Theater Program 6A, The Halloween Special

The Rejection Slip Theater Halloween Special © (http://feeds.feedburner.com/rejectionsliptheater ) first aired on October 30, 1994 on Newsradio 1040 AM.

The lineup:
"Mind Bender," written by Kevin Mayer or Norwalk, Iowa was adapted for radio by RST.
Cast: Linda Blakely, John Busbee, Patti Choate, Paul Berge, Greg Anderson, and Ed Weiss.

"Trick or Treat," the Artie Azzetti Halloween 1963 story set in Westwood, New Jersey by Paul Berge. Included in the cast are: Greg Anderson, Doug Hawley, Richard Choate, and Morgan Halgren as Mrs. Azzetti.

"Recovery," written by Michael Cornelison under the pen name Doug Fountain. Cast: Michael Cornelison, Greg Anderson, Annie Meacham, Doug Hawley and Paul Berge.

Dedicated to the memory of: Ed Weiss and Doug Hawley.


Credits: Rejection Slip Theater (original © 1993), was created and produced by Joseph Pundzak and Paul Berge. Michael Meacham, Technical Director. Joseph Pundzak, Executive Producer. Michael Cornelison, Director. Dr. B. Lugosi, Phlebotomy Advisor. Original music by Jamie Poulsen. All original written stories remain the copyrighted property of the authors, used with permission by Rejection Slip Theater, which retains all rights to the audio productions. Most performers are available for voice work through Radio Garage in Urbandale, Iowa (http://www.radiogarage.com/). Our podcast guru is Dan Wardell.
More RST podcasts at: http://feeds.feedburner.com/rejectionsliptheater
RST web site and Contact Us: http://www.paulberge.com/

Rejection Slip Theater Program 5A, 1994, 1995

Rejection Slip Theater © Episode 5 A contains (http://feeds.feedburner.com/rejectionsliptheater):

Part 2 of "China Seas" starring Richard Choate , Michael Cornelison, Carol Gale and Ed Weiss. China Seas was written by Paul Berge under the pen name, Armand Cassandra.

"Neicy" Written by Barby Gatschet. Cast: Morgan Halgren and Michael Cornelison.

This week's Adventure of Artie Azzetti and the Gang © is called, "Snow Days," written and performed by Paul Berge. In the proto-spirit of No Child Left Behind, Artie Azzetti explains how to cancel school using the forces of nature, a little Voodoo and your imagination.

Credits: Rejection Slip Theater (original © 1993), was created and produced by Joseph Pundzak and Paul Berge. Michael Meacham, Technical Director. Joseph Pundzak, Executive Producer. Michael Cornelison, Director. Original music by Jamie Poulsen. All original written stories remain the copyrighted property of the authors, used with permission by Rejection Slip Theater, which retains all rights to the audio productions. Most performers are available for voice work through Radio Garage in Urbandale, Iowa (http://www.radiogarage.com/). Our podcast guru is Dan Wardell.
More RST podcasts at: http://feeds.feedburner.com/rejectionsliptheater
RST web site and Contact Us: http://www.paulberge.com/